Recapping My Life

Sometime 23 odd years ago in the month of September, I was born.

Well to be honest, I have no recollection on the things that happen before I was six years old other than the times I cried when I entered Kindergarten, fell in love for the first time at the same place with a girl whom I can no longer remember other than a vague image of her throwning plasticine at me. Well I had projectiles thrown on me all the time so it doesn't really matter.

Primary school was kinda special to me. I am totally different from what I used to be. As well as my memories can serve me, I think I was a very quiet boy and was a very fat and quiet boy. I think I was so fat that if I hang a picture of me on the wall, it would fall off. I fell in love with the second girl of my life for perhaps a good six years and I realise for the first time how having an erection felt, but never knew what was it for.

It was at that time I also realise how my head was made up of different molecular compositions compared to normal Earthlings and I had this tiny bit of righteousness in me. I could never stand it when people cut queue infront of me while I am buying burgers during recess. They can cut queue behind me.

I still hold a grudge for my form teacher when I was in primary six. Something bad really happened. I nicknamed her the "Rocket Legs". In my humblest opinion, I think the girth of her legs was as big as my head. She was a fucker-ress. I did something which I thought wasn't that big of a deal. But she seriously made a big fuss out of it and even kicked me out of class and FORCED me to go home. I guess it must be because she was rejected sex the other day by her husband. I was just unlucky to be at the receiving end of her wrath.

Secondary School was something I was looking forward too. I felt that I was turning into an adult. Though I was pretty disappointed that I didnt end up in the same school as my second love. I harbour a fraction of thoughts of her for the next one year.

Perhaps it was during this phase which shaped up a major part of what I am today. I made a group of friends who remain important roles in my life. I fell in love for the 3rd time when I met a girl in my Sec 1 class for perhaps the next 3 years.

I realise my strongest subject was Chinese and was also very fluent in certain adjectives and pronounciation of Hokkien words. Thanks to the many explanatory diagrams drawn on the seats of buses and doors of the toilets, I finally realised what an erection was and lost my virginity to my left hand. Or was it right? I was also one of the fastest at typing messages on pagers and in non-contrast with my appearance, someone even commented my voice was sexy when I left voicemail for them.

Due to my size, I tore up quite a few pants especially the zip area. I know sometimes my eagle wanted to be released from the cage. But I didn't know it was that badly.

When I was 16, I met the fourth true love of my life. The ironic part was I didn't even knew her yet I was that madly in love with her. In recent years, I finally get to know her as a friend which was enough for me. She remains as very special memories of mine. Just memories.

I didn't know how I managed to pass my O-Levels though I spend a good deal of time hanging around Mcdonalds just right before the exams; in the name of revising. In actual fact, I was just contributing to its daily closing account with all the pies, fries and drinks I bought. Right before the exam, I nearly had to get new pants as well.

I obtained a good 17 points, just enough to get into JC, a lousy JC which was just around my vicinity. Well of course I didnt and chose to go poly instead.

Poly life sucks. I think it must have been the worst 3 years of schooling life. Other than two of my unlucky friends whom I drag along with from my secondary school, I think I made less than two friends throughout that 3 years.

Not that I was that unpopular, I just don't bother making new friends at all. That explains why my secondary school friends remain an important part in my life even till now. Without them, I have none.

I was a late bloomer. My first kiss was when I was 18 with my first girlfriend. I must confess I feel kinda guilty towards her. I was with her more of like I wanted a girlfriend rather than I loved her. That explains why we only lasted for like 1 month. Make that 30 days. It sounds better. At least it's double digit.

As much as I detest my poly life, I still manage to get my diploma in 3 years. And unlike other poly graduates, I still remember clearly till now where I place my diploma certificate back at home. Because without it, the table in my room will still be rocking non-stop.

Right after I graduate, I had a second girl of my life. Technically and theoretically speaking, she wasn't my girfriend at all. She was more like a fling. There was strictly no love between us. Just physical contact to appease a certain part of the devil in each of us.

Awaiting for me after my poly life was of course what the majority of the Singaporean guys hate; Army for the next good 2 and a half years.

To be truthful for once, I was among the minority of people who can't wait for enlistment. To my thinking back then, I wanted to achieve great feats in future and if I can't even stand life as a soldier, how can I ever fulfill my dreams?

I felt so mighty, so passionate, enthusiastic and ever-all-ready for army; for the next one year. After one year and enlisted into my new company, I realise being a soldier is good, but is taking too much of my time. I wanted to finish the remaining good 1 year as soon as possible. But it was also thanks to Army that I met a number of good friends who did all the dirty work with me.

During this army phase, I had the 3rd girl in my life. Things got pretty bad, I mean really bad during the initial phase. It's hard to give details on what actually happen because everything happen within a short period of time.

It was hard to go through that phase during that period itself. But thinking back now, I am actually laughing. I guess it's part of the growing up process. I remain very good friends with the 3rd girl.

Right after my army, I was kinda pretty lost on where I should go from then on. Due to my lack of abilities during poly, my results were not enough for me to enter local Universities. For three years (Since I was initially in army) running, I have been stupidly paying money to them to send me rejection letters. Fuck~

So this result to where I am and what I am today. Typing an entry in my blog all the way from Brisbane, Australia, as a student of University of Queensland.....